


He Awoke and Found it Truth

by Zoi no miko (zoi_no_miko)



Category: Dark City (1998)
Genre: Epilogue, First Kiss, Inspired by Fanfiction, M/M, Memory Alteration, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-01
Updated: 2014-03-01
Packaged: 2018-01-14 05:32:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1254748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zoi_no_miko/pseuds/Zoi%20no%20miko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I am certain of nothing but of the holiness of the Heart's affections and the truth of Imagination...</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Awoke and Found it Truth

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Nothing But Time and a Face That You Knew](https://archiveofourown.org/works/33999) by [little_giddy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/little_giddy/pseuds/little_giddy). 



> Inspired by the gorgeously wonderful gift I received for Yuletide, Nothing But Time and a Face That You Knew ♥. And while this little drabble has nothing on the beautifully wrought tale that inspired it, I thought it worth posting anyway. :)
> 
> Title from a John Keats letter.

"Which one will you choose?" John says quietly, almost conversationally, and set his glass down on the coffee table. Daniel knows he refers to the small glass vials, each containing almost an entire life, that have been sitting untouched on his desk for weeks. He sits perched on the other end of his psychiatrist's couch from John, ignoring the chair and all the stereotypes. He is not a psychiatrist in this moment, and not the scientist who worked for years under the control of the alien species that has stolen so much from them. When he is with John he is just Daniel, just a man, and he wants very much to keep it that way.

Daniel turns to look at the vials quietly, the small pieces of alien technology that he's turned over and over in his hands so many times - first one, and then the other. He's no closer to an answer, a decision on which vial to use, which past to embrace. In one, his own past - or a fair approximation, at least. The opportunity to regain what they had stolen from him. In the other... the life and times of the new John Murdoch, as told by one Daniel Schreber. A past that would echo the one he has given John.

He had explained it to John, when they'd first begun to spend time together. After they had raised the library from the depths of the underneath to give the inhabitants of the city the keys to Old Earth. John had listened, and given a little nod, almost amicably. "Well, I suppose you have as much time as you like to decide."

Now it is no easier than it had been then, though. He's tried to give himself deadlines, tried to force his mind to reveal what he most wanted, but still he balks.

John follows his gaze to the desk, knowing well the dilemma. He is silent for a moment, and Daniel is considering offering another drink when John finally speaks.

"I won't take it as an insult, you know."

Daniel's gaze snaps to his. "I'm sorry?"

"You should be you again. Don't worry about me." The words are said carefully, with no specific one weighted more than any others, and yet, Daniel realizes suddenly, it says it all. He stares at John for a long moment, then starts to speak.

"I don't know what the me from the past was like," he says slowly, still a little unaccustomed to the luxury of long conversations. "I'm not certain I will like the person I would have become. Or be able to cope with...." he makes a vague motion to the city beyond the window, "all of this. But the other vial..." he pauses, still searching for the right explanation, and notes the way John tenses slightly without meaning to, sitting a little taller. Daniel drains his glass and set it aside, then leans forward just a little. "John. I would like nothing more than a lifetime of memories of you. To remember being beside you every step of the way. But that vial - that's not what it is. That vial was designed to give me the ability to control you. Manipulate you. That's not what I want for me. For us."

Daniel sees understanding light in John's eyes, and a little of the tension dissolves from his shoulders. "Hence the ongoing dilemma."

"Yes," he says, and gets to his feet. It only takes a few steps to cross the room to his desk, to pick up the vials in one hand, the glass cool and smooth against his skin as they clink against each other. He leaves the syringe where it is. "I think perhaps that I've known what I wanted all along," he says, crossing the room to the small sink that John had thoughtfully provided with the addition of the wet bar. He glances back to find John rising slowly, watching him, but he stays standing by the couch, making no move to join him.

"I've liked these past few weeks very much, John," he tells him, voice lower, softer than he intended, revealing the emotion he's tried to keep hidden. "I've enjoyed getting to know you, spending time with you. I want that to continue... just the way it is."

Then, before anything more can be said, Daniel turns to the sink, twists the top off both vials, and pours the precious contents down the drain.

He hears a sharp intake of breath, a swirling of power tugging at the quickly escaping liquid, and turns to find John standing beside him. His friend is staring at the vials with what could almost be described as horror. "Why? You out of everyone in the city most deserve to have a real past. Why throw that away?"

"It wouldn't be real," Daniel replies simply, setting the empty vials aside and turning to face him. He watches his own hand as he brings it up slowly, quite deliberately, to rest lightly against John Murdoch's jacket. He keeps his eyes on that, on the familiar, as he speaks. "What I have now is real, this reality we've made for ourselves. That's what I want. To know you as I am now."

"I don't want you to regret - " John whispers harshly, but stops as Daniel looks up at him, blue eyes intent despite the scarred right eyelid.

"I won't," he says simply. His other hand slips up to join the first on John's chest, and Daniel grasps his lapels gently as, nervous and trembling, he leans in and presses his lips to John's.


End file.
